Shape Effigy
An Idle Incremental Game
Build All The Shape Effigies
(or not, it is really up to you...if you want to disappoint everyone depending on you...that is your choice)
Triangle
Three sides. Three corners. Zero regrets. The Triangle has been an icon of stability since ancient times — mostly because it's too stubborn to fall over.
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Circle
No corners, no edges, no compromises. Philosophers have spent centuries debating whether the Circle is perfect or just showing off. Your customers don't care — they just want one.
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Square
Four equal sides. Four equal angles. Zero personality — and that's exactly why people love it. The Square is the dependable coworker of the shape world: reliable, forgettable, and always there.
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Diamond
A Square that got tired of standing flat and decided to live on the edge — literally. The Diamond commands a premium because nothing says "I've made it" like a tilted square on a pedestal.
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Rectangle
The Square's elongated cousin who never quite lived up to the family name. The Rectangle is technically a Square, but don't say that to its face. It's sensitive about the proportions.
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Trapezoid
The shape most likely to be forgotten on a geometry test. The Trapezoid has one pair of parallel sides and a lifelong chip on its shoulder about it. Collectors prize it precisely because nobody expects it.
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Hexagon
Six sides of pure efficiency. Bees figured this out millions of years ago and nobody has topped it since. The Hexagon is nature's most smug shape, and it knows it.
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Cross
Equal parts vertical and horizontal ambition. The Cross has appeared on flags, churches, and first-aid kits throughout history, which either means it's universally beloved or wildly overbooked.
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Super Triangle
What happens when a Triangle hits the gym, gets a degree, and starts believing in itself. The Super Triangle is everything the original wanted to be — and it charges accordingly.
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Four Square
A bold grid of exactly four squares, arranged as if daring you to play a childhood recess game. The Four Square effigy radiates the confident energy of someone who never got called out at four square.
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Flower
Botanists spent centuries classifying real flowers. You just manufacture them by the truckload and sell them to people who apparently prefer their flora non-perishable and vaguely unsettling.
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Home
A roof, four walls, and an implied family inside that's definitely fine. The Home effigy sells briskly to people who want a house without a mortgage, a neighborhood association, or any of the other horrors of actual homeownership.
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Light Bulb
The universal symbol for a good idea — which ironically makes it the most purchased effigy by people who have run out of them. Display one prominently and let visitors draw their own conclusions.
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Camera
An effigy of the device that captures memories, sold to people too busy building an effigy empire to make any. The Camera is technically non-functional, but it still somehow judges you.
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Snowman
Mankind's oldest tradition of building a humanoid effigy out of frozen precipitation and then watching it slowly die in the sun. Yours lasts longer and doesn't require a scarf you'll never get back.
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Arrow
Points decisively in one direction and refuses to apologize for it. The Arrow effigy is ideal for buyers who have strong opinions about which way is forward, even when they're clearly lost.
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Candy
A swirled confection frozen in effigy form — all the visual appeal of candy with none of the cavities. Customers report a faint sweetness when they hold it, though that may be wishful thinking.
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Glasses
Two lenses joined by ambition and the implicit promise of intelligence. The Glasses effigy doesn't actually improve your vision, but it does make your shelf look considerably more sophisticated.
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Tree
Humanity spent millennia planting trees. You manufacture them in bulk and ship them via spaceship. Conservationists are conflicted. Your accountant is not.
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Traffic Light
Red, yellow, green — the holy trinity of municipal authority. The Traffic Light effigy tells you nothing about when to go, but having one in your collection sends a clear signal: you have arrived.
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Ice Cream Cone
The effigy of civilization's greatest achievement: frozen dairy in a crunchy vessel. Does not melt, does not drip, does not bring the joy of the real thing — but your buyers will pretend otherwise.
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Radioactive
The trefoil symbol has warned humans away from certain death for decades. As an effigy, it's completely safe — which some buyers find disappointing. They were hoping for something a little more exciting.
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Chess Board
An 8×8 grid of alternating squares that has humbled kings, grandmasters, and anyone who's played against a computer since 1997. The Chess Board effigy requires no strategy — just deep pockets.
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Danger
A warning sign shaped effigy — which raises the obvious question: is the sign warning you about the danger, or is the sign itself the danger? Either way, it sells, and that's what matters.
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Dice
Six faces, each one a promise of random fortune. The Dice effigy won't actually roll — it just sits there, silently reminding you that sometimes the universe decides, not you. Buyers find this either comforting or enraging.
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Double Black Diamond
The ski slope rating reserved for experts and the dangerously overconfident. Owning this effigy implies you belong on the hardest terrain — even if the closest you've been to a mountain is this transaction.
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Moon
Humans spent billions of dollars and risked lives to reach the Moon. You just manufacture it and ship it. Same general shape, considerably less drama, and it fits in a warehouse.
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Pizza Slice
The most fought-over shape at any gathering, now immortalized in effigy form. Cannot be eaten. Cannot be shared. Cannot end a friendship. In many ways, it is the superior pizza slice.
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Tetrahedron
Four triangular faces united in three-dimensional purpose. The Tetrahedron is what happens when a Triangle stops limiting itself to a single plane and starts thinking bigger. Considerably more expensive as a result.
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Flag
Plant it anywhere and declare the territory yours. The Flag effigy carries the weight of nations, expeditions, and moon landings — all without the inconvenience of actually governing anything.